Surgery is all over

Thursday was my surgery.  I am glad it is all over.  It seemed like a long morning for me.  Surgery wasn't scheduled until 1pm so I had to wait all morning.  I got up with my little one and he climbed in bed with me.  We put on his favorite show, Calliou and cuddled watching it together in the darkness.  I got him dressed and fed him breakfast just like every other morning.  My husband I and dropped him off at school and it was so hard.  I just hugged him tightly and tears rolled down my cheeks as I said goodbye.  I felt so sad leaving him knowing I was going for surgery.  He was so happy to see his friends and think about his sleepover for later that night that he didn't even notice I was crying.  I watched him walk into the classroom and slowly turned and walked to the car. 

My husband and I started the hour plus ride to the hospital.  I put on some relaxing, Zen, harmony music on my ipod the whole way there.  It did wonders to keep me calm and tear free.  I can't believe what a difference the music made in my mood.  Once we got to the hospital, I kept the music playing until my surgery. We were there for over 2 hours before surgery was to begin so the waiting was hard. 

Before I knew it, I was prepped and ready for surgery.  Saying good bye to my husband was hard.  We both cried.  Then I walked to the OR with the staff.  It was hard to see my husband wipe tears from his face.  I have only seen him cry 3 times before (when my dog died, when my son was born and when I told him I had cancer).  I know he felt so helpless and there was he could do. 

I remember getting into the OR and climbing up on the table.  Everyone was ready for me.  It was time. 

The next thing I remember was waking up and people talking to me.  It was about five hours later and I was out of it.  I remember my husband and friend coming in and talking to me.  I was so tired.  I don't really remember pain, I just felt out of it.  I just wanted to sleep.  I do remember having a Popsicle somewhere in there, but nothing else. 

The rest of the evening was a bit rough as I was so nauseated.  I could not keep much food down and I started throwing up.  They kept giving me more medication for nausea and a pain pump to control the pain.  It was a long night with little sleep, but once I was no longer nauseous, I felt so much better.  I was able to have food and get up to go to the bathroom finally.  The pain was there, but not as bad as I thought. 

I got home a few hours ago and am resting comfortably in my bed with my best girlfriend here to take care of me for a few days.  I was welcomed by gorgeous flowers from my husband, a cookie bouquet, gift baskets and more. It was like Christmas when I got home.  The only thing missing is my son.  He is still at his sleepover having a good time which allows me some time to rest and catch my breath. 

I got through surgery OK.  I am glad it is over with.  What a relief.  I hope the pathology doesn't reveal anything else bad.  I will pray for that as I get some rest.