"Don't spend time worrying about how you are going to die. Worry about how you are going to live today"

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

A Normal "Hair" Day

I have to say how glad I am that I did the Penguin Cold Caps to preserve my hair during chemo.  It has been a long road for sure, but I am pleased to have enough hair to look normal to others.  There is something to be said for not walking in a room and feeling like everyone knows you had cancer.  Just like my blog says, "Breast Cancer Won't Define Me", and for me it's true!  Having hair just makes it easier at times. 

Last night I got a call to substitute an aerobics class this morning.  This would be the first class I have taught since we moved out of state.  I have been dying to teach so I was ready to do it this morning.  I went in there and taught that class just like I always have.  I was a little weak on the upper body given my surgeries, but overall it was a good class.  The people were nice and appreciative to have a good class since their regular instructor could not make it today. 

After I left, I started thinking what it would have felt like to teach that class if I had not used cold caps.  At this point, my new hair growing in is about 1-1 1/2 inches long. If I had not used cold caps, it would still be pretty obvious that I had lost my hair.  It felt so good to walk in there just like everyone else and feel "normal".  I know the alternative would have been a room full of people staring and wondering for the entire class about what type of cancer I had.  It's like walking in and saying "Hi, my name is Maria and I had breast cancer.  So, let's get started with class!". 

For me, using cold caps was a blessing.  It is allowing me to move on step by step beyond breast cancer.  When I go out or meet new people, no one knows my personal business.  It allows me to share my situation with those that I choose to tell.   It felt so good to get back to a "normal" activity and a normal day.

After that, my day got even more "normal" as I had to go to the Secretary of State and get a new drivers license.  Well that is always a treat, but this time I was super happy to see the photo on my new license.  It was me, with hair.  Since I have to keep that photo for the next four years, it was nice to look like the pre breast cancer me again.  I was so happy, I didn't even mind waiting in line!

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